It's kind of weird looking at older posts. I almost want to delete them because I don't feel that way anymore...but then I would be erasing a time in my life that I'll never get back. And I don't want to do that.
You know, I've never been great at song-writing. Hell, I wish I could be articulate/driven enough to put my feelings into a beautiful ballad or something of the sort, but I've just never been able to do it like other people. Which is fine, I guess...
There are some people that I wish I could always be with, or always be a part of their life. You know, watch them change into the person they were called to be, see their strengths build others up, and see their weaknesses help those who struggle with the same things...I wish I could just be there to witness where life takes them. It seems like it would be a fascinating journey that I'd never want to take a break from...
That's how I want to feel about my guy. I don't "want to want" to have control..if that makes sense. I want to be able to say "wherever you go, I will go" and mean it, too. I want to be there, holding his hand, following him like a shepherd, trusting every move he makes will help me grow to be a better person, and knowing all the while that every single one of his decisions are made out of his unconditional love for me and what I mean to him.
I can't wait for a love like that. There is something so rare about that, and it makes me wonder if there really is only one "right" person for you. I think there is. I haven't found him yet, and that can only mean one of 4 things:
1. He doesn't exist.
2. He died.
3. I already met him and he just thinks I'm a complete nut case.
or 4. We haven't crossed paths yet.
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